I AM FROM

diane at 50. poem first published on February 28, 2020 at writingwhilewhite.wordpress.com

i am from young love

from passionate firsts

raised in the midwest

i am from quiet readers & avid swimmers

from bacon & ice cream

gardeners, quilters & creatives

i from Catholics & Christians

from nice quiet white folks

and liberals with loud voices

i am from teens & trauma

with little trust & plenty of fear

from broken dreams & suburban hell

i am from brand names & plaid skirts

where competition is the game

and abstinence the preferred plan

i am from land of the big & bigger houses

places built in spaces stolen & claimed

where safe clean & nice means white

i am from the must hustle

pull yourself up by your bootstraps

everyone is equal mentality

i am from a herstory of

isolating as an instinct

questioning everything, especially me

i am from a land of lies

full of stories we tell ourselves

about who we’re supposed to be

i am from a sea of whiteness

where we don’t see color

and can’t imagine being a racist

i am from tv that didn’t play 24/7

programming that turned to static at night

long before MTV killed the radio

i am from buy more & be smaller

fake it ’til you make it

bury your emotions and secrets

from beer in the tap & wine on the table

loud fights & fucking behind closed doors

public displays of a drunken ego

from drawers full of diet pills

to empty your plate

because there are starving children in China

i am from Sunday family dinners

with blame & shame on every knife

where defensiveness & denial ruled.

i am from Turtle Island

from Amazons

wimmin around the globe

i am from lovers of love

creators of life, touchers of bodies & souls

space holders for death

i am from cellular material

from stardust

from you.